UNICORN HORN, ANYONE?

I don’t think there’s anything that I can say that is better than the picture. A picture says a thousand words and all that. You can buy this!

 

BREAKFAST – THE MOST IMPORTANT MEAL OF THE DAY

Now you can drink the most important meal of the day. Have some nice waffle flavored vodka with a side of bacon flavored vodka! I feel scared.

 

 

 

VAMPIRE CIRCUS

Within two minutes I was about to turn this movie off because it was just SO DAMN HORRIBLE!!!!

But then the first vampire died who was just absolutely annoying so I thought, okay, maybe I can deal with this. I mean, would you want to watch a movie with this guy in it for 90 minutes?

So I kept watching and was rewarded with a midget clown!!

There is also a lady painted in tiger stripes:

And she’s just in a G-sring and paint. Plus there is the magic of editing! Where for once second there is a black panther and then in the next it has magically transformed into a vampire!! How did they do that?

There’s also a strong man in a leather skirt for the ladies.

So for these things we can overlook bad acting, bad dialogue, bad sets, bad costumes, and of course absolutely no historical accuracy whatsoever.

Okay, this bit is so hilarious that I had to stream the movie on my laptop so I could do a screen capture and take the image myself. A VAMPIRE WITH CAVITIES!!!!

 

 

UNSPEAKABLE HORRORS!!

Atrocities like this only come around once a generation. It is almost too horrible to describe, and those dared to gaze upon it shudder and wake screaming in the night. It is known as…CHERPUMPLE!!!

It appears to be a normal cake, but the trickle of goo is an ill omen.

Burnt offerings are placed upon it in an ancient ritual.

JB goes mad as he looks upon the horror.

Appelina smiles wickedly as she gazes upon the monstrosity that she brought into this world.

The sacrifice has begun!

Shield your eyes lest ye go mad!!

I am going mad just looking upon it! How can something such as this exist in a sane world? Cherry pie baked into a chocolate cake, on top of pumpkin pie baked into a yellow cake, on top of of an apple pie baked into a spice cake!! All topped with frosting and colorful sprinkles!! OH NO!!

 

Oh the horror of it all!!

Thankfully the monster cannot survive long in our world, and implodes upon itself, thus sparing all those who were not present at Appelina's and JB's BIRTHDAY PARTY OF DOOM.

And coming soon, REVENGE OF CHERPUMPLE!!!!

* Please excuse the blurry photos, I was drunk.

* If you every decide to attempt this horror, I suggest putting the pumpkin pie on the bottom, it’s more structurally sound than apple pie.

 

I DO NOT ENDORSE THESE ADS

Today Hubby told me that there are Google ads on my blog. Since I’m logged in all the time I don’t see them. I logged out and checked out my site and a few others and I still didn’t see the ads, but I saw them on his computer. I don’t know why that is happening. But he did point out that one of the ads was for In-Home-Pet-Euthanasia! What the hell is up with that? It was even on my post of “Too Adorable.” I don’t want people to look at an absolutely adorable kitten and think of pet euthanasia! So I just want to make sure that people know I have nothing to do with them.

Here is a funny picture to make you feel better: